Old 06-05-2012, 13:11   #1
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Tm Sgt Advice

Being a Tm Sgt is at times like being a father with up to 11 grown boys. The advice provided to those boys can range from career development to female management. The issues that come up can be pretty entertaining at times and call for unusual advice. Although not an SF guy a good friend of mine usually has a very unique persepctive on female management so I want to share this. The story was related to me to be included in my book "Men are from Mars, Women are from Hell" so he uses the term "disciple" as in "satan's Disciple" to refer to the woman.

Anyway, here is the story:

My son has his first real girlfriend, very serious. It's her birthday. He called last night and was complaining that he couldn't find anything for her gift and was thinking about just going on a shopping spree with her. My wife, in typical disciple fashion, began "counseling" him on his lack of romance, the fact he should have thought about the gift earlier, he should know what she wants, etc., etc. I quickly realized the poor boy needed rescuing and some sound fatherly advice to get him through this difficult time.

I took the phone away from wife and got the specific directly from him. I broke down the facts:

1. It's pretty damn late to be buying a gift
2. You're in college, no job, and any money you spend on this is coming from my paycheck
3. He was only thinking short term, immediate impact

My advice was to do something simple, thoughtful, and personal that would have not only the immediate impact of satisfying the moment, but would have
significant long term benefits. I told him to go to a store and buy supplies to make her a homemade card. And use lots of glitter. His reply was not enthusiastic. I again outlined the reasons for this action stating that he had to consider the long term benefits and reiterated the use of lots of glitter. He said he didn't want to use glitter because it was stupid and I replied the glitter was the most important part. He asked why?

I told him that the immediate impact was he had given his girlfriend a gift from the heart, something that could not be purchased and no one else could
possible give to anyone, truly romantic. That was the immediate impact. The long term benefit was in several years he would, at some point, go out
with the guys and would end up in an unapproved business. The result would be he would come home covered in glitter from the stripper that gave him the lap dance. At this point he would be able to say "but I was just making you a card like I did before!"

For the first time in 25 years, my wife was speechless.
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Old 06-05-2012, 14:11   #2
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That is truly inspired advice.
On a similar note Bud Lite at one time had glitter on their bottle stickers. I knew lots of guys who switched to drinking that swill for the same reason.
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Old 06-07-2012, 11:20   #3
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Cool

MVP, Thank you for the laugh. That was good.
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Old 07-16-2012, 10:35   #4
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An opportunity...

This weekend I went with my wife, Kids, and neighbor (also with wife and kids) to see a movie. We ended driving two cars (females and males). We all arrived in the parking lot at the same time where upon we (males) immediately took a parking place out a bit from the theater. The women on the other hand drove up and down the rows looking for something closer but in the end they of course ended up parking further out than us. While we (the males) were standing on the curb waiting I realized this was a great training opportunity. I said "Boys, this is an excellent example of the difference between men and women. We got here and quickly found a parking place while the women are out there driving in circles wasting our time, our gas, and our patience".

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Old 07-16-2012, 11:52   #5
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ROTFLMAO. That just made my day. I had not seen it during the original post. Now back to work.
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Old 07-16-2012, 15:31   #6
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Talking

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... I said "Boys, this is an excellent example of the difference between men and women. We got here and quickly found a parking place while the women are out there driving in circles wasting our time, our gas, and our patience".

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Did you also point out this is "secret guy knowledge"? As such they shouldn't tell Mom what you said?
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Old 07-16-2012, 15:57   #7
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Telling mom

No, I hope one of them does...

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Old 07-16-2012, 16:05   #8
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Did you also point out this is "secret guy knowledge"? As such they shouldn't tell Mom what you said?
My sons all learned that one a long time ago. Once they told Mom something like that and we all felt the Richter Scale-level reperrcussions, they quickly realized that our conversations had a "GUYS ONLY" coversheet attached to it which usually meant a Mom version of a "CONGRESSIONAL" would follow if leaked.

My sons are 27, 30, and 42...and the "code" still applies.

And so it goes...

Richard
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Old 07-17-2012, 07:53   #9
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The storm

I have learned to weather the storm and in many cases the end result was worth getting it going, I can usually sense when I have reached the "eye". Eventually the validity of the message may get through and positive results come about. Not saying there is not an application for the "guys only" classification but in this case didn't feel it was required.

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Old 07-20-2012, 07:49   #10
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This is a follow-up to thr original post I rec'd this morning.

Subject: Re: PS.com (UNCLASSIFIED)

My son is doing arts and crafts, WITH GLITTER!!!

And my daughter just registered to vote - REPUBLICAN!!!!

I am so proud of my family!

End of msg

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Old 07-20-2012, 08:16   #11
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You had me in awe at "I took the phone away from my wife...."
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Old 07-20-2012, 18:27   #12
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You had me in awe at "I took the phone away from my wife...."
I sorta teared up when I saw "wife.....speechless". God, if only.
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Old 07-27-2012, 09:34   #13
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As I think back seems like most of the guys on teams fell into one of three categories;
The self-starters (most of the guys), those that needed to be kicked in the ass regularly (few of these), and those that just needed a little attention, good or bad to keep them on track. I had one guy that used to come to me all the time and ask "you haven't spoken to me much, am I doing ok, am in trouble" Just had to pat him on the head periodically and he was fine.

Had a team mate when Rocket Rick was TS who had new plans, new worries every day and needed counseling from Rick. Pretty soon Rick gave him the code name "Ann Landers"

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Old 07-27-2012, 10:01   #14
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Frost Fire posted this in the Happy Thought Thread but many of the points made belong here, I think.
The points made and the attitude/professionalism displayed deserve wider disemination.
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. . . FT Bragg represents the best and cleans the house at a recent trauma course. Distinguished honor grad, honor grad and all

It's a challenging course with 1.5years+ grad school material compacted into < 5 months. Being the most junior and inexperienced student, I was shaking in my boots to say the least when we got the books and syllabus. By His grace, it was doable. One day at a time, one page at a time.

I'll attest to the applicability of lessons learned from my mentors and this site outside selection: Don't be late, last, lost, light, or lippy, do the best you can, pay attention do details, don't FTFSI, and practice selflessness. The last one is the best as not only I survived, but thrived, never whined, volunteered to lead PT and be S6, and was able to tutor officer and enlisted alike, giving back mother army more than the expected ROI.
Attitude of gratitude and beggars can't be choosers went a long way too
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